Crash's Story

Each of my kids came into this world in their own, unique way. Crash was no different. He's the one who always keeps us on our toes around here. He's been that way from even before the very first breath he took.
Goober was finally into the manageable "older" toddler stage and my husband was getting ready to graduate college when we decided it was time to add to our family. I had an uneventful pregnancy (except for being bone-tired). I can still sing every single song from the early Veggie Tales movies. Most days in those first couple of months, I would baby- gate off the kitchen and hallway, deadbolt the door of our apartment, lock the sliding glass door to the balcony (those of you who know my kids know why) and pop in a Veggie Tales (VHS!) video, dump some toys onto the floor with his blanket and pillow and a sippy cup and collapse onto the couch for a nap. Occasionally, I'd shoot up, hurdle the baby-gate and lose my breakfast. Good times ;).
Eventually, the tiredness and morning-sickness eased up and I was able to get out more to take Goober on walks and to the playground. I was so happy with my little family and things were going great. My husband graduated that winter and almost immediately found a job in Indianapolis. Given that this was almost two years after 9-11 and things were still a bit unstable, his getting a job right out of the gate in his field was amazing. That also meant a move. We quickly found another apartment in Indy and made the move. At that point, I was 36 or 37 weeks pregnant. I called around trying to find a new OB, but nobody would take me that late in the game. I shrugged it off and figured "well, when it's time, we'll go to the hospital and SOMEONE will have to deliver this baby!". It was a crazy time for us. A relocation, a new job, a new baby; we'd found a new church and were trying to get acclimated to our new area. We'd barely gotten the basics un-packed by week 40 when I woke up on a Saturday and felt "off". I was having some lower back pain and tightening in my stomach. We waited a few hours to see what happened and it didn't stop, so, we grabbed my bag and Goober and my husband took us off to the hospital. We ended up getting sent home with "false labor". UGH. Early Sunday morning, I woke up feeling uneasy. I'd had a monster sinus infection for weeks. I didn't want to take anything because of the baby, so I was miserable. My head was pounding, I couldn't breathe and ran a fever off and on for a couple of weeks. It's hard to sleep when you can't breathe. I lay there watching the sun come up and trying not to disturb my husband. Eventually, I was uncomfortable enough to turn over and then I heard an audible POP and then there was a gush. My exact thought was, "false labor, huh? Pfffttt!" I woke my husband up and awkwardly got everything together again. Things get a little fuzzy after that (weeks of very little sleep, remember), but I think we waited for my mom and sister to arrive to take care of Goober before we took off for the hospital. I think. I remember getting there and getting settled into a room. It was a teaching hospital and I got gawked at by a ton of residents parading in and out. Not having learned my lesson the first time, I stupidly opted for another epidural. Guess what? Once again, they hit several nerves. I vowed in that bed that any subsequent babies would be totally epidural-free. The good thing was, I had normal labor this time, not back labor and it actually worked that time. The pain gone, I was able to sneak in a couple of "kind of" naps.
Eventually, a nurse deemed it "time". All of a sudden, it seemed there were dozens of people in my room. If it weren't a teaching hospital, I'd have been a little nervous about that. Things went very quickly. Crash made his entrance just a few minutes after that. There was a triumphant "It's a boy!" and we smiled. The baby hadn't let us peek there at the four-month-ultrasound and because of all the upheaval, we hadn't had any others and didn't know the sex of the baby. I knew in my heart he was a boy, though. I shot an "I-told-you-so-smile" at my husband. Something wasn't right, though. He wasn't crying. Once I re-focused, I realized the room had gone eerily quiet. There were several nurses/students around me and I craned my neck to try and see Crash. I said, "what's wrong?" I got a pat on the arm and a "nothing, honey". Suddenly, the air in the room was charged and instead of quiet, people were flying around. I sat up and said, "what's wrong with my baby?!" A couple of nurses came over and tried to placate me again and I said, "NO! Tell me what's wrong!" One of them finally met my eyes and said, "he's just having a little trouble taking his first breath, that's all. Sometimes the epidural can make them kind of sluggish". That's ALL?! It had already been who knows how many minutes. It felt like an eternity. I knew that after seven minutes without oxygen, the brain starts to die. I heard someone mutter "intubate" and I felt my body go cold all over and my heart dropped like a rock. I know I was holding my breath. I remember them talking about tubes while they rubbed on Crash and tried to stimulate him. As they were getting ready to intubate, he took a deep gulp of air and began to breathe and cry quietly. He sounded like a kitten. A cheer went up and I started breathing again. Once they were sure he was okay and breathing well, they placed him in my arms. He had a blueish/gray tint all over. His lips were purple. His little hands and feet were purple. They stayed that way for two days. Just like with Goober, I opted to have him room in. I wasn't letting him out of my sight! I woke up from dozing once, early in the morning to find a Dr. and a bunch of residents standing around my bed and his isolette. The Dr. smiled and asked if it was okay if he asked some questions. I said, "sure". He asked me some basics and then asked, "are you going to have him circumcised? Having already fought that battle when Goober was born, I raised myself up, looked him in the eye and prepared for round two. I firmly said, "absolutely not". He smiled and said, "good!" and noted something on his clipboard. I saw several of the residents look at him with surprised looks on their faces and he led them out. I hope that today, there are several more open-minded Dr.'s out there who will respect a mother's right to make that choice for her son.
Crash was such a good baby! He fit into our family seamlessly and hardly ever fussed. I was amazed at the difference from when Goober was a baby. Sometime around one-and-a-half, though, he began watching his brother. He began to get a glint in his eye. Soon, Goober had a partner in crime and the two of them were wreaking havoc on our house! Goober taught him everything he knew, and Crash was a good student. Diapers were flung at walls (they discovered that early morning wet diapers absolutely EXPLODE when they hit the wall. Bathrooms were flooded, I was locked out of the house, messes were made... . Those early years are a blur for me, really. I came to equate hysterical giggling with, "here we go again". We bought baby gates like clockwork- always looking for the one gate they couldn't thwart or scale. I don't think we ever did find one ;).
The years have flown by and while Goober has finally settled down, Crash has taken up the cause and soldiered on, filling our lives with color and excitement. There is never a dull day when he's around. While he's definitely our wild-child, he's also my biggest cuddler. It seems like such a contradiction, but that's what makes him special. Crash gives the best snuggles you've ever had. He seems to be all-boy, full-steam ahead, but he has the biggest heart, especially when it comes to the ones he cares about. Every now and then, he'll slow down and open up and show us what a tender heart he has. I'm not sure what the future holds for Crash, but I'm sure whatever it is, he'll charge head-long into it and give it everything he's got ;).
Happy 9th Birthday, Evan Ryan, we love you so much!